Since 99% of them have removable stylus's the one thing I've noticed that is important is the plastic body of the stylus usually needs a piece of damping material applied. I use no-rez. I'm sure just about anything would be ok. Although I am curious if some of them you could just toss the body and insert the metal diamond shape without it (the shape also has the cantilever attached to it).
Anyways, I apply it to the face. On some stylus also the sides if they're thin.
The irony here is to enjoy a fabulous MM you need a nice stereo, otherwise it's not going to be too riveting and you may want an MC to bump your enjoyment as they can make up for a lot of a stereo's downsides.
Recommendations for a cart are sorta challenging because it's easier to recommend one based on what your stereo already sound like, but always anything but conical. If you want to start at neutral... well that's a long road.