So... I created my own Apple ID, wiped/reset the two iPads I have, and started fresh. I spoke with apple, and the only way to download/sync my new iPads with my iTunes library, was to do something they call ‘family share’. Since all of the music I purchased via the iTunes Store was bought with the ID I shared with my wife, this was the only way. Music from my imported cd’s of my own collection would not be a problem.
I’m not thrilled; I would have liked a complete separation of the id’s, but this was the best workaround. Whatever.
I am fully aware that this post may make no sense, nor appeal to anyone, but I felt I should at least close this out.
As for what has been said regarding Apple support, I agree. I was in a chat session for about 40 minutes, and my problem was resolved as best it could, with minimal trouble.